Expectations lead to disappointments. When you are in higher rank, people expect a lot of things from you. They want instant change, abundance, and even perfection.
Even when we were young, we experience a lot of disappointment out of illogical expectations. One time when I was at the park, I saw a little girl eating a pink cotton candy. Looking at it, I felt the saliva running in my mouth. But I knew it was just deception. After one bite, the girl looked heavy-faced, gave the cotton to her mother. She cried then her mother scolded her.
In my point of view, the little girl was hungry. When she saw the deliciously-looking cotton candy, she expected it would suffice her hunger. It was after one bite that she realized the cotton was not a food but a sugar filled with air. She got disappointed.
Disappointment often leads to frustration. With the girl’s realization that the cotton candy wasn’t what she needed, she got frustrated to cry for another food she could find at the park.
I used to complain about my parents. I see from others how their parents take care of them. Their parents talk to them all the time, ask them about their problems, express their feelings, tell them how proud they are, etc. They were never abandoned when they were kids. They are with them all the time. These are the ideal qualities of parents for me. And as I grow up, I realized that I have what I least expect from my parents. I got so frustrated, asking a lot of questions about their inadequacies.
When I got a job, I was also beginning to feel disappointed of my bosses. They seemed to be incompetent, poor communicator, poor listener, slowpoke, complacent, lazy, coward, and the list of bad qualities goes on. But of course I was wrong about a lot of those things.
As I share my sentiments with other people, I realize I am not alone. Many people have the same kinds of parents I have. Some of them even had worse, if I was to compare them. The only difference is that they didn’t expect the way I expected from my parents. They accepted them the way they are.
Also when a person holds a higher rank, it doesn’t mean he/she is perfect. He/she must have his/her share of trials and challenges that we may not be aware of.
The only way to avoid frustration is by avoiding being disappointed by not expecting too much from anything or anyone.
Original work from Avoiding Frustration
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